Jan 5, 2016-

Crack it free

Dear Aunt,

I think I am in love, Aunt. We work together and we have naturally been hanging out a lot, and I always have an amazing time with her. I think she likes me too but I don’t think we can pursue anything beyond friendship. It’s because we share a complicated past: She is the best friend of my ex-girlfriend. My ex-girlfriend and I weren’t that serious, but things were going smoothly when she suddenly broke things up with me. This happened nearly four years ago. Since then the both of us have found different partners. She’s with someone else right now, and is quite happy. But I think it’d still be weird if anything happened between this girl and me. What should I do, Aunt? Should I tell this girl about my feelings? Or should I just bury my feelings?


Dear Naren,

I see no reason why you should bury your feelings, Naren. You like this girl and you say she likes you too, why should you guys not give it shot? Yes, your ex-girlfriend might be a bit taken aback when she hears the news but if she is happy with someone else and she really cares about her best friend’s happiness then she should be okay with it. And besides, you dated her four years ago! But I think it’d be best if you talked to her about it; it would be better if she hears about it from you rather than an outside source. But before everything else, you have to tell this girl how you feel! Don’t keep your feelings bottled up—especially love.

Leave the baggage behind

Dear Aunt,

Four years ago, I was in a relationship with a girl who was a year younger than me. Our relationship didn’t even last a year because of her unruly and immature behaviour. I ended it in bad terms. I chose to move on from that relationship but somehow I could never get over her. Whenever I take a step forward to commit myself to another woman I back out. I just can’t seem to get over her. After many failed attempts to get over her, I tried contacting her. We made amends and she too agreed to give it a shot one more time. It meant the world to me. It seemed like my life was set. After a couple of days, however, my friends told me that she had left for the US and had left a letter for me saying how her revenge turned out to be sweet. I have so many questions bugging my mind Aunt. Why did she do what she did? Was this fair to me? What should I do?


Dear Gaurav,

I’m so sorry to hear how your ex-girlfriend left so cruelly with so many questions unanswered. Sometimes people can be careless with other people’s hearts, and you cannot blame yourself for it. But you have to ask yourself this question: What made you end the relationship in the first place four years ago? Things didn’t work out then; what made you think that things would work out this time around? You tried to get back together and make things right with her, but she clearly doesn’t want what you want. What she did was harsh and unfair; a mature conversation between two people was all that was needed, but she ended things childishly. I know it’s a tough road ahead for you but I think it is about time you let go, Gaurav. Sometimes, that’s just the best way to go forward—leave the baggage behind.

Published: 05-01-2016 09:30

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