Our lawbreakers have endorsed a bill to increase their salary and chiya kharcha. I think our lazy bums are really out of touch with reality. They have no shame and act like this country is their personal property and can be divided and sold to the highest bidder for their own personal gain.

I don’t know who gave them such ideas but it’s time we sent our lawbreakers to meet up with shrinks so that we can at least figure out why they are so eager to loot us all. Was it because they had a difficult childhood or was it because they were just too lazy to find real work and make an honest living? Or were they Kings in their previous lives and now had to steal from all of us to maintain the lifestyle they lived then?

Our psychiatrists could help them overcome the mental illness they seem to be suffering from and achieve better mental health. Maybe, hypnosis could cure our netas! Yes, people do quit smoking, quit drinking and who knows, our clowns could quit looting through hypnosis. Wouldn’t that be great for this country? Then, finally we would have honest politicians with morals, integrity and character. And instead of only thinking of how to exploit the system and extort from everyone, they would for a change think of making this country and our lives better.

Our pickpockets will receive Rs 124,000 from the next fiscal year! It seems that our politicians want to reward themselves for procrastination. I think we should have a ‘no work, no pay’ system for our clowns!

It will take an average Nepali more than a year to make what our lawbreakers will get in a month. Why is there no outrage when our politicians continue to loot the state treasury to fatten their bellies? We have already spent billions of Rupees feeding these greedy pickpockets and it seems that they will not come together to resolve the political crisis in the country. Instead, they will keep on asking for more perks while delivering nothing.

We all know that our political parties have yet to agree on the names, number of provinces and boundaries and what not. Who knows, we might even be lucky enough to witness CA Part 3 and our politicians can waste another decade doing nothing while the country goes down in flames.

When it comes to sharing the loot among themselves, our clowns cross party lines, come together and support each other. But when it comes to doing something good for the country, our clowns blame each other for the mess we are in, accuse each other of being foreign stooges and threaten each other with bandas and what not!

While our clowns pat each other for raising their pay and perks, our doctors at the Teaching Hospital have decided to boycott the out-patient department to support the ongoing hunger strike by Dr KC! I think we should also support Dr KC and his demands and wear black armbands to work.

Whenever we see our politicians riding around town in luxury vehicles, let us all wave black flags to show our displeasure or we can go a step further and learn from the South Koreans when it comes to organising mass rallies.

It’s been two weeks now that Dr KC started his tenth hunger strike. Our Health Minister Gagan Thapa is in China. Thapa did visit KC a few days ago to inquire about his health. I guess Thapa can’t do much and he would be better off if he resigned now. He could win some political points and at least tell the world that he did try to help the doctor but the mafia was just too strong to fight against during the next election campaign!

Our Prime Monster doesn’t care. Why should he? He has already accomplished so much in his 100 days in office that he can take credit for the way this country is moving for the next decade. But what must we do to pressure our incompetent government to address Dr KC’s demands?

Taking to the streets will not be enough for our government. We cannot act like savages and destroy public property like the cadres of our political parties. We cannot block our highways, shut down our schools and businesses and hurt ourselves. Our netas and their cadres can do that because they don’t have to go to work and make an honest living!

We cannot ask the Madam President to help out because she is busy cutting ribbons and making sure Ram Dev Baba open up factories for his ayurvedic products in this country. Yes, Ram Dev has promised to help this country with the profits from his factory in Nepal. Yes, our billionaire NRN Dr Mahato is partnering with the Baba.

Who knows, one day, the Baba’s shop could sell everything you need from birth till death! And we can ask him to at least brew some herbs that we can offer to our politicians and civil servants to cure them from various ailments that make them misuse their authority and loot from the state and the people!

Guffadi is a grumpy old man who blogs at guffadi.blogspot.com. You may contact him at [email protected]