Mar 6, 2019-
I was a pebble lying lazily on your lawn in the lunar month of Shiva Ratri. I remember the day as fine as the features on a snow flake, for the frost was so freezing it numbed me down my nerves. I couldn’t even sleep. It was a deadly dawn after the darkest night I had ever experienced.The sun rays were just struggling to appear. It was then, in that abandoned moment, that you opened your door. The door of the ignorant high walls you’d built out of your insecurities which surrounded you, cozily, comfortably.
It was then that your eyes sparkled with the infinity in you—the infinity of darkness and terror. Praise the heavens, for my frost seemed like it was gleaming as your eyes shone. My numbness started breaking, as you loped around your lawn like those uncoordinated loops of broken orange CDs attached to the rods of your bicycle’s tires. And then?
Wait a moment, I am describing you with my numb fingers.
You walked, caressing every particle on your place with warmth even in that freezing cold. Walking, carefully but with ease, as you do in a ballet. Graceful, you were.
I was there. Somewhere on your lawn, but on a fortunate space. Maybe. For, it was your warmth that melted my frost, a little. For then, you felt like the Eternal God of Small Pebbles.
There are certain feelings that go around. You feel them, but you can’t comprehend them. It’s so puzzling that you spend entire moments thinking about what it was like to embrace them. And then, in your pool of comprehensions and thoughts, you start wanting them, to feel them forever.
Such was your touch.
I remember I had wanted you to go because you had shown me something that felt new. The frost was painful, but a pain that was familiar, that I could tolerate. But, the memory of you is far larger than my capacity. This pain erases me and withers me to sand.
Shah is a Plus Two student at St. Xavier’s College, Maitighar
Published: 06-03-2019 10:13