CHAOS OR COMFORT?

  • Agonyaunt

Mar 26, 2019-

Dear Aunt,

I am on a gap year before I begin my undergraduate, but I have yet to decide if I want to pursue my undergraduate in Nepal or abroad. Since all of my friends are going to colleges in the US or Australia, I have also decided to tag along with them. But to be honest, I am really scared and uncertain about studying abroad.

I have never helped my parents with household chores or worked a day of my life. I wake up leisurely at 10, now that I don’t even have to go to school, I just hang out with my friends the whole afternoon. I do look for colleges and universities with my friends but the more I talk to them, the more negatively I feel about going abroad as I feel I am not as motivated as my friends.

I am ashamed to confess this to my friends and my parents. I am not even sure if I want to study in Nepal either. I don’t even know what I want to study. When my friends talk about what subjects they want to take if they get accepted to certain colleges, I get very anxious because that is something that I cannot even understand.

I have always been an average student, but at the moment, I feel dumb. I feel that I have no aim, and I am going to ruin my life because of my indecisiveness. I really want to be sure about my life and have plans, but they simply don’t come to me. I don’t know what should I do.

—Biraj

Dear Biraj,

Many young people in our country want to go to foreign universities but that doesn’t mean all young people should pursue the same trend. First, it is ok to be confused about taking decisions at your age, but you need to communicate this with your parents. This is nothing to be ashamed about.

If you have realised that studying abroad may not be your cup of tea then there is no harm in picking a course and a college here in Nepal. Although it may seem as though your friends are all sorted out regarding their choices and decisions, they may also have their own struggles. So, going to foreign universities just because your friends have decided to do so will not only be foolish but a decision that you could regret in the future.

That said, it is important to come out of your comfort zone, and in your case, your cocoon. Pursuing formal education is not enough to learn about the ways of the world. You should be responsible for yourself—have a healthy lifestyle, cook and clean up after yourself, and learn to make contributions to the household. Whether you decide to study abroad or not, these skillsets will always help you live a better life.

You need to understand that not being able to decide what to study further will not ruin your life. You just need to communicate with your friends and parents about your dilemma and take their suggestions on how you can move forward. Some people know what they want at an early age while for others, it takes more time and thought. Don’t compare yourself with your friends.

Published: 26-03-2019 21:00

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